In Loco Parentis

In Loco Parentis:

"Latin for in place of parent. The legal doctrine under which an individual assumes parental rights, duties, and obligations without going through the formalities of legal Adoption."

I've signed two of these for my upcoming deployment. One for my mom, who is going to care for my son for the six months my husband and I are both gone at the same time, and the other for my husband's aunt in the event something happens (my husband's parents watched Tyler last time we were both gone so when Rob's aunt asked if she could be the back-up we said of course) and my mom needs someone else to care for my most precious treasure... Tyler.

As scary as an In Loco Parentis is (scary at least to me because you're giving parental rights to someone else), I have to say I am blessed.

I've met single and dual military service members who don't have the options that I have when it comes to their child. Not only is my mom and my husband's parents willing and eager to watch my son Tyler, my husband's aunt and uncle are ready to care for my son, my sister wants a turn, and there are other family members who I can say without hesitation, would gladly take my son long-term if we needed them to! Not everyone can say that and as hard as it is to sign those papers, I know... truly know... that my son is loved and has a number of places he can call home.

In addition to the local parentis, my husband and I have a family care plan and in the -hopefully unlikely- event of us both dying, my husband's parents will become Tyler's guardians (a decision we made since my mom would be a single parent) and although my mom understands why, she cried and said just in case my will needs to give her visitation rights! =) Why do I smile at that you may wonder? That's because I'm touched and happy that it means so much to her.

When it comes to problems, if it's a problem to have people ready and willing to care for my son, and they care enough to get emotional over it then bring it on; I'm relieved to have that problem.

Now I did talk to my mom and reassure her that she has nothing to worry about. She now feels better, but also explained to me that the visitation part is non-negotiable, lol. Also, she is ecstatic that she will have Tyler for the six-month overlap my hubby and I will have. Well, I guess I better work on my will and I guess I better keep smiling because my son is loved-- and tough logistics or not, pertaining to getting everything in place, I have options!